2015 Races

I'm getting back into doing some races.
I have the Shamrockin 1/2 marathon next Sunday.

The Elk Grove 1/2 marathon two weeks after that.

The San Francisco Marathon in July.

I also signed up for the California International Marathon in December.

It's shaping up to look like a good year.
I'm sure I'll have a few other races.

Long time...

It’s been way too long since I last posted.

I would start writing and think that I’d finish it later and...

January 31 was big for me. 

Six months cancer free.

February came and went.

I got back on my bike for a couple of rides.  I didn’t go more than 15 miles but everything felt good. 

I started doing some pull-ups, push-ups, and sit-ups/planks, but I was having a little discomfort around a couple of incision areas so I decided to back off.  I think I’m ok and I’m probably over analyzing things.

I’ve been running regularly; about 30 miles a week.  I’ve been doing a 14-16 mile long run on the weekends.

Cancer is still a good reminder that nothing in life is worth getting overly anxious about. 

I’ll get done what I can get done. 

I’ll get where I’m going when I get there. 

I can’t change the outcome of so many things, so why be anxious or bothered by them?

Ok...

At least I got this post up.

Time and Persistence of Memory

Going through recovery after prostate cancer surgery I’ve noticed some changes in my attitude about time.

I don’t get anxious about being late when I have somewhere to go. 

If I’m 5 minutes late to something it’s not going to change the world. 

If people get worked up about it that’s their choice, but I’ll get where I need to be when I get there. 

I’ll get the things done that are going to get done. 

If something doesn’t get done today, I guess it’s just not going to get done today. 

Maybe tomorrow?

I’ve always had a secret admiration for people who can show up 10-15 minutes late and don’t seem to even notice.

I want to be one of those people.

I think I value my time more than before.

I enjoy living in the moment more than I use to.

I take time to find the little things that bring me joy.

New year - new goals.

My big race for 2015?

I signed up for the San Francisco Marathon, July 26.

That will be just 4 days short of 1 year cancer free.

I also signed up for the Shamrock’n Half Marathon March 15 and I’m going to lead a pace group for the Elk Grove, Running of the Elk Half Marathon, March 29.

I’ll probably do some other half marathons, a triathlon or two, and maybe California International Marathon at the end of the year. 

I’m just going to enjoy running and being fit and healthy.

Goodbye 2014

2014
A difficult year.
A life changing year.
A year I got blindsided by Prostate Cancer.
A year that could have kicked my ass, physically, mentally, and spiritually if I didn't have:
My Faith
My Wife
My Friends
My Church
My Co-workers
My Dogs
My Running
(The list is in no specific order but notice I didn't put dogs or running before anyone? )

It's kind of amazing that I came up with a Personal Mission Statement (Look on the right side of the blog) at the beginning of 2014 not having a clue what was ahead.
It's still my Personal Mission Statement.
I am so much more prepared to deal with life's problems. (Another thing to thank Cancer for)
Little problems don't matter and big problems are little.
I'm not going to let little troubles get in my way.

Dr. Seuss summed it up pretty good in I Had Trouble in Getting to Solla Sollew.

Put on my shoes and GO

It's been a while since I heard that voice in my head.  It was pretty weak this morning.  It wasn't screaming at me.  It was more the voice of a someone with emphysema gasping for breath.
It said, "Don't go out in the wind and rain this morning for a run.  You can do it tomorrow.  You're still recovering and you need some rest."
As soon as I heard that I put on my shoes and headed out the door.
What a GREAT little run in the wind and rain.
I enjoyed it so much that I added an extra mile just to say…
Fuck You Cancer

And may I remind you Cancer how that "recovery" you mentioned is going:
November 1:  11 mile run around Lake Natoma
November 2:  8.5 mile Apple Hill run
November 8: 11 mile run around Lake Natoma
November 11: 12 mile run up Donner Summit
November 15:  11 mile run around Lake Natoma again
November 22: 14 miles from Lake Natoma to Granite Bay and back (In the rain)
November 26: 15 miles Auburn to Cool and back
November 27: 10K turned into a 9 mile walk for Run to Feed the Hungry
November 29: 11 mile run around Lake Natoma (In the rain)
December 6: 11 mile run from Lake Natoma to Folsom Lake and back (In the rain)

Less than 0.1

What a relief. 

I just had my 3-month post-op appointment. 

The anxiety has been building over the last few weeks.

“What if...?”

“What will I do...?”

I couldn’t keep the worry, doubt, and fear from creeping in.

My PSA?

Less than 0.1; virtually undetectable.

I couldn’t ask for better results.

Another nail in the coffin of Cancer.

I was able to get my mind off my PSA results on my long runs on Saturday and Tuesday.

I had an epic run with Jon and Jess on Veteran’s day.

We went up to Donner Summit and ran on the Pacific Crest Trail up above Castle Summit.  The views were great, weather was perfect, and the company was awesome.

This was definitely a run to be repeated.

3 Months Post Surgery

Ok... I missed blogging last week.

It was a tough week.

I just lacked motivation.

Morning runs were tough.

Seemed like I didn’t have enough time for everything.

I did make it out for an 11 mile run around Lake Natoma on Saturday, but it was one of those runs that I never got into. 

Figured I’d get into it after a mile or two, two or three miles, maybe four or five miles, ok... eight or nine miles?

Ten miles in I just wanted to get back to the car. 

Just one of those days.

I even went home and took a nap...

But, it makes the good days seem all that much better.

This weekend, a completely different story!

Made it out to the lake again, this time with four from our running group. 

I felt great and pushed myself quickly up the hills.

After 10 miles I still had a lot in the tank so I picked up the pace the last mile.

Sunday, I did the Apple Hill 8.5 mile race with Jon & Jess. (My wife Andrea even came and walked the 3.5 mile course.)

Great running weather, about 40 degrees at the start. 

After the race we hung out in Apple Hill for a while.

Great Day!

Now for the deep stuff.

I’m getting anxious about my 3 month PSA test coming up.

I’ve read too many posts from guys who go through surgery and still show some PSA in their blood, then have to do radiation or hormone therapy.

I really don’t want to do either of those.

I try not to think about it, and I know by being anxious I’m not going to change anything.

But damn it, it’s still there.

Well, screw cancer.

I’m still fighting and I’m not letting down.

I’m eating clean, juicing, running, and trying to reduce stress.

I’m doing whatever I can to keep it from coming back.

I feel good right now and nothing can take that away.

I had a great day with my wife and friends, and nothing can take that away.

I had a wonderful weekend and kicked butt on the running trails... can’t take that away either.

Shit, I have a pretty wonderful life... can’t take that away.

Looks like I kicked cancers ass and I’m still kicking it even though its down and out.

13.1

Quick update since I can't seem to find the time to get things done.
In January I signed up for the Urban Cow half marathon.  It starts and finishes just a half mile from my front door.  Little did I know about all the events that would take place to get me to October 5th.
After I was able to run the Zero Prostate Cancer 5K in San Francisco two weeks ago I realized that I might really be able to finish a 13.1 mile half marathon.  I figured I might have to do a lot of walking, but hopefully I could finish, and if I didn't, there would be plenty more to come.

Fast forward to Sunday, October 5:
It was the 10th Cowtown / Urban Cow gathering at our house since it's so close to the race.  Friends bring their friends, and friends of friends… and this year was no different.  Great to have everyone over in the morning.  Going into the race I planned to run 5 minutes, then walk 1 minute, throughout the race.  I wasn't sure how far I would make it or how fast, or should I say slow, I would run.  Jon stuck with me the entire way and Jess joined us at the halfway relay point.  I was amazed I felt so good.  I had some energy left after mile 12 so I picked up the pace to the finish.

I finished in 2:22:49, way better than I would have ever thought I would do.  I thought my time was about the same for the SF marathon, first half, I ran three days before surgery.  It was… my time in SF was 2:22:27, just 22 seconds difference.  I took both races real easy with no time goal but it felt good to run the same pace pre and post surgery.  I feel good.  I wasn't sore after the race and I'm still not sore more than 24 hours later.

I'm not planning any other races for the rest of the year.  I'd just like to get back to doing at least 30 miles a week by the end of the year.  I'll wait until January before I really think about races for 2015.  I'd like to get in a marathon next year and maybe a 1/2 ironman.  I'm not going to push anything.

8@8

It’s ironic that the ironman triathlon at Lake Tahoe that I was training for when I was diagnosed with prostate cancer (April 30, 2014) was cancelled due to smoke in the air from the large fire in the Sierra Nevada Mountains.

Makes me think back to May; when I was struggling on which treatment to choose.

If I did radiation I wouldn’t have to change my training schedule much.  I could most likely still be in good enough condition to do the race.

If I did brachytherapy, implant little radioactive “seeds”, I would have to cut way back but might still be able to do the race as long as I started treatment soon.

If I did surgery I wouldn’t be able to do the race at all.  I’d be risking serious injury if I got back on the bike too soon.

Or, if I had listened to the first urologist I talked with, I could have waited until after the race then begin my treatment.

Then I shut the door.

I made up my mind that I wasn’t going to do the race. (At least not this year)

I couldn’t let one race cloud my judgment on what treatment would be best for me in the long run; 5 years, 10 years, 20 years down the road.

As soon as I made that decision the smoke cleared and I was able to look at my choices logically without any barriers.

After talking with a radiologist and second urologist I was 100% convinced that robotic surgery was what I needed.

Fast forward to July 30.  Radical Robotic Prostatectomy.  It wasn’t a cakewalk.  Going into it I was hoping that, maybe, because I was in good shape, I’d recover quickly.  That all flew out the window after surgery.  I was going to take as much time off work as I needed.  I worked at making myself rest.

Fast forward to six weeks after surgery.  My surgeon said that I could start running again six weeks the surgery.  (Some doctors say earlier is ok, but wasn't going to push it.)  If I wasn't ready I’d wait seven weeks, or eight weeks; whatever it took until I was ready.  But at six weeks I was able to run 3 miles and felt good.

Fast forward to seven weeks post surgery.  I had the support of 30 people walking and running the Zero Prostate Cancer 5K in San Francisco with me, one day before the ironman in Tahoe was supposed to take place.  Looking at it now, I think - no - I KNOW, that 5K means more to me than it would have if I had completed the ironman.

Fast forward to eight weeks post surgery; today.  I went back out to Lake Natoma to my usual weekend long run spot.  It was good to be out doing a long run again.  I went out 4 miles with some of the group then turned back as they went further.  On the way back that voice I hadn’t heard in weeks came back at me. 

“You call this a run?”

“You’re so weak.”

“You probably can’t even finish this 8 miles.” 

All I could do was laugh.  I actually laughed out loud.  Hopefully nobody was watching or they would have thought I was crazy. 

I’d heard that voice before I was diagnosed but it really hit me hard, and time and time again after my diagnosis.  I wrestled with it then.  I said I was going to win this fight and I did.  So when that voice came back today; I laughed, turned up my music, picked up the pace, and finished the 8 miles.  Eight miles, Eight weeks after surgery to rid my body of cancer.  I’m sure it’s been done before but I’m not racing against anyone. 

I like what one of the greatest runners ever, Steve Prefontaine, said:

“You have to wonder at times what you're doing out there. Over the years, I've given myself a thousand reasons to keep running, but it always comes back to where it started. It comes down to self-satisfaction and a sense of achievement."